Singing Bird Holistic Health Coaching

What My Bout of Road Rage Taught Me

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I just got home from running a few errands. I was driving with the windows down, the music on, feeling calm and pensive, when suddenly the guy behind me gets right on my tail. He swerves into the right lane, guns it and cuts in front of me. My cackles go up, and in a semi-enlightened moment, I flash him the peace sign instead of the finger.

But then something interesting happens. Instead of letting the moment go and going back to my calm state of mind, I get PISSED. Then I pull into the right lane and gun it (hoping that will teach him a lesson?!?), but the car in the right lane is going SLOWWWW. Like Sunday driving, 25mph in a 40mph zone, slow. Cursing my fate I am right behind him when I realize, “Shit, suddenly I am the asshole driver!”

This is good old reactivity at its finest, and I admit, not my finest moment.

I am writing this though because I saw firsthand how contagious energy can be if we are not careful. Instead of flashing the first guy the peace sign and peacefully moving on with my day, I took on his energy. I felt entitled, stressed, and my body was tight. I started driving just like him. And it did NOT feel good.

I received two important reminders in this three-minute time span that I would like to share with you:

  1. You don’t need to take on another person’s energy. You don’t need to be reactive. I could have stayed in my creative, calm place, but my ego decided against that. I made that split-second choice. Good to notice and I hope to do better next time!
  1. Watch the energy that you put out there! We all continuously affect one another. To create the positive ripple effect that we desire for the world, we must start with ourselves. Every moment is a new opportunity to spread love, joy, and peace instead of stress, anger, and worry.

This week, I invite you to pay closer attention to how other people’s energy rubs off on you and also how your energy sends shockwaves to the people around you.

We are all human and no one is perfect. When you react from a place of ego that feels icky (like I did today), give yourself some extra compassion and understanding. And maybe even buy someone’s coffee later this week to tip the scales back in your favor.

The Power of Story to Change the World

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When I first came across the victim statement of the woman who was raped by the Stanford swimmer Brock Turner, I was enjoying a lazy Saturday morning lounging in bed. A sickened feeling came over me as her words pierced directly into my heart. As I am certain was the case with many of you reading, I could not shake her story from my head. If you haven’t read the letter she wrote to her attacker, you can find it here, and I highly suggest you read it. Yes, it is long. Yes, it is painful. And it should be.

I think there are multiple reasons this particular case had the makings of a powerful media storm. Young, white, affluent Stanford student, training to go to the Olympics is found guilty of three counts of raping an unconscious woman behind a dumpster. I have seen his face, clean cut and smiling out of his yearbook photo, repeatedly splattered across my Facebook feed. “Is this what a monster looks like?” the headlines seem to be silently asking. Then the judge only gave him six months in county jail because a longer prison sentence would affect his life too much.

Everything about this case is disgusting. It has laid bare the horrible inequities of our justice system when it comes to gender, affluence, and race.

But unfortunately this is not an unusual occurrence. Someone is raped or sexually assaulted every TWO MINUTES in the United States and only 3 out of 100 rapists will ever spend a single day behind bars for their crime. It is outrageous and needs to be dealt with.

Before this case however, hardly anyone was talking about it. I wasn’t. My friends weren’t. But now we are.

The true reason that this particular case has cut through the usual media clutter, sunk beneath our skins, and taken up residence in our collective heart, is the eloquent and gut-wrenching words of the woman Brock Turner raped.

This is no longer a shitty and overwhelming statistic that we can brush aside. This woman so courageously sharing her experience allowed each of us to see ourselves in her, feel her pain, and thereby begin to feel the pain of every other woman who has suffered similarly in silence.

That is what has made us stand up against rape culture stronger and louder than ever. Her words have united us.

Less than a week later I watched McKinney Boyd High School senior Larissa Martinez give her valedictorian speech, revealing her status as an undocumented immigrant. Her mother fled Mexico City with her two daughters to escape an abusive and alcoholic husband. (Hear about their story here and listen to the full speech here.)

Her speech gave me full body chills and brought tears to my eyes.

Here again was a courageous young woman standing up, owning and sharing her story. Reminding us that behind every statistic is a human being, just like you and me. That is a part of the equation that we always need to remember.

It was then that I had this realization that filled me with a sense of hope and empowerment…

Women taking back their stories, owning their truth, and sharing in community will change the world.

That community may be a small, local circle or a giant, international blog following. It might be your best friend. The medium and reach matter less than the intention and the act itself. By daring to be vulnerable, we are courageous, and we inspire other women to do the same. The sharing of one truth begins to create an environment where women’s stories are heard and honored.

I know that this might seem too easy, too simple and small to have an impact on the world’s larger problems, but don’t believe that. It’s a trick. Believing our stories are insignificant is what keeps them locked inside of us, prevents us from speaking up and speaking out. There is someone in your community right now who needs the unique medicine that only your story can offer.

In sharing, you can help another woman to heal while simultaneously healing yourself. With that ripple effect, we will eventually heal the world.

 

 

 

 

 

Reclaim Your Body’s Sacred Ground – Special Offer!

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  • Do you have difficulty relating to or feeling your body?
  • Do you often get stuck in your head and forget that you have a body?
  • Do you believe that your body needs to be rigidly controlled and if left to its own devices would lead you somewhere horrible?
  • Do you frequently dominate your body with your mind by over-exercising or doing specific workouts, not sleeping when tired, forcing yourself to eat only certain foods, etc.?

If any of these speak to you and you are looking for a new way of relating to your body – a way that is softer, more loving, and infinitely trusting –I would like to make you a special offer.

I am currently developing a new group program that I am very excited about called Reclaim Your Body’s Sacred Ground. The focus of this program is healing the relationship that we as women have with our bodies.

It suddenly crystallized for me that how we relate to our bodies is really a metaphor and microcosm of our relationship to the feminine energy as a whole.

This program combines SO MANY facets of what I have learned on my road to feminine embodiment, including: coming back home to the body, exploring and overcoming limiting beliefs about our own bodies and female bodies in general, developing an intimate level of trust with your body, exploring what is truly nourishing to you, and treating your body with reverence.

My whole life began to shift in dramatically positive ways when I began to change the relationship with my body.

This program asks: What would be possible for you if you knew that your body is sacred?

As I am developing this group program (launching this fall), I would love to work with a handful of women one-on-one exploring these particular topics. Therefore, for a limited time only I am offering 25% off my standard one-on-one coaching prices to coach you around coming back home to your body as sacred. This is really a unique opportunity as it will be the only time to experience this program with me guiding you one-on-one.

This offer is available to four women who are ready to change how they feel in their bodies. Coaching will begin in July.

Please note, this is NOT health coaching or exercise tips. I will not be letting you know how to get a “bikini ready bod” in time for summer. This is for women who want to come home to themselves, and find love, joy, and radiance within their gorgeously feminine bodies as they are right now.

If you want to reclaim the relationship with your body, I would love to speak with you. Email me with your interest at singingbirdhealth@gmail.com.