Singing Bird Holistic Health Coaching

Are You Sick and Tired of Trying So Hard?

Apparently I have been walking around espousing some Yoda wisdom for the last couple of months unbeknownst to myself.

After I attended a women’s empowerment retreat at the South Wind Equestrian Center last fall, I wrote myself a note to remember what I had felt and learned that day amongst the horses.

One line in particular stood out to me and left an imprint that didn’t begin to resonate more deeply until months later:

“Linda, you don’t have to try so damn hard all the time.”

You see for most of the day I had been trying really damn hard. Trying to be present. To feel my feet. To embody my queen. To be in my leadership energy.

Wanting to use all my tools. Wanting to do it right.

Nearing the end of the day, I was exhausted and at most felt like the horse had humored me by following me for a few seconds at a time. (In the energetic work that you do with the horses, you get them to follow you in the pen without touch or words.) I felt frustrated and disappointed; this was not what I had been expecting.

And in my frustration, my mask of “trying” finally fell off. I dropped needing to do it right or look a certain way. Instead, I snapped my fingers and stomped away (somewhat like a petulant child), and wouldn’t you be damned, that horse started trotting along behind me as if I had been doing this all my life.

That horse followed me because for the first time that day, I was being myself. I was honest.

My action stemmed from the truth of my feelings and my being in that moment.

There was no trying. It just…was.

I couldn’t fully grasp it in the moment. Something had shifted, but because it wasn’t in line with what my conscious mind was expecting of the day, I had a hard time embracing its meaning fully.

It wasn’t until months after this experience that I realized how much this energy of “trying” permeated my life. And how freaking exhausted I was because of it.

Those of us who tend to be pleasers and over-achievers are so accustomed to trying that we don’t even notice that we are doing it. That we are in that energy. I still have a hard time describing it in words, but am starting to sense how it feels different in my body.

Trying isn’t doing that is grounded in my feelings or in my being. It is this striving, externally motivated thing, as if pieces of myself are located outside of my body and I continually need to find and collect them.

It’s very tiring and I am over it.

So instead I am adopting the Yoda approach to life. “Do or do not, there is no try.”

The energy around that feels much cleaner, clearer, and more grounded.

I am conscious now of when that trying energy seeps in from time to time, as it invariably does. Or how often it pops up in my vocabulary, and that of other women.

After 20 years of living in this constant striving, it was a horse who helped me to see it fully for the first time, so that I could feel its weight fully for the first time. And now I can make a different choice.

And so can you.

On April 14th I am co-hosting Dancing with the Rhythm of Nature with South Wind Equestrian Center and Soulshine Rhythm Experience. Dancing with the Rhythm of Nature is a full-day retreat featuring Qoya movement, energetic work with horses, drumming, and time spent in nature to come back home to ourselves.

To experience the ground of our being and what it means to take action that is in alignment with what is true and authentic for us.

We have a handful of spots still available. If you are ready to experience the physical sensation of truth in your body (i.e. what it feels like when you drop the TRYING), we would love to have you.

Reserve your space via Eventbrite now.